Walls

Each day that goes by my walls are growing.
My walls to keep everybody out.
Each day I can feel myself blocking everyone.
Blocking people I’ve trusted for so long.

I have no answer to why I do.
My best explanation would be the feeling of rejection.
The respond I get from people.
The feeling they make me feel.

Giving assumptions before I can explain myself.
Thinking I’ll be judged before I complete my story.
Being filled with hurt when I open up.
It’s not a feeling I like.

Don’t think my walls make me happy.
In fact it brings pain that I can’t use my voice.
It kills me that my stories can never be told.
Sadness that fills my heart that can never go away.

I’ve experienced these walls and had them for a long time.
People breaking them down made me feel weak, yet complete.
I tried for so long to keep them off.
Now they are growing up again, and I have no control.

People might say I have the control and this is what I want.
Only if they have experience it, 

then they’ll no it’s not a paradise.
It’s a situation I wish no one to be in.

It’s a mental disorder that no one knows.
A sickness that is hard to heal.
The only medication is to know you can trust someone.
But no matter how strong that medication can be;
the sickness will always come back when the treatment is neglected.

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Simple

It can cut like knife,

and be buried inside you like a needle.

It can leave you scars that last.

Or scars that stays.

It’s not as harmless as it seems,

but it’s much more dangerous than you think.

Once you let it go you can never take it back.

Hundreds of apologies can’t heal a single strike.

It can drive someone mad,

or drive someone crazy.

Just simple words can make someone cry,

and it can make someone happy.

So, before you strike a word make sure you choose your words wisely.

The tongue has no bones, but is strong enough to break a heart. So be careful with your words.” ~Unknown

Lonely Heart

Those days where you just feel so lonely

When everything hurts just by looking at it.

Where you just wanna drop everything and cry.

When you wish people would come and vist,

Or the lifeless room would just be filled with joy.

When you know your lonely heart cant take another sorrow,

Where you want the whole entire world to pause,

Or better yet fast forward to the time where you feel no pain.

Those days where physical pain sounds much better than emotional pain,

but knowing you have to keep your head held up high even though inside you is falling into pieces.

When you’re the only reason why everything else is not crashing down…

When you know the reason to be strong are for those you love,

Showing no slight negative emotions.

Not knowing what to tell anybody if they find out…

Trying to battle everyday with a huge smile,

and just ignoring everything during the day,

but a facing them again at night..

“Some people think that to be strong is to never feel pain. In reality the strongest people are the ones who feel it, understand it, and accept it.” ~Unknown

Appreciation

Thank you are two simple words,

that means so much.

Two simple words that touch our heart.

The meaning of the words that can bring smile and happiness to those who done good deeds.

Our parents taught us these two simple words to use in our daily life.

They taught us to say these words,

because it shows that we are glad others do things for us.

But now everything changed.

People leave the two simple words are rotting in the dark.

People push these words away.

Instead of showing appreciation people become selfish,

by getting angry just cause their wishes wasn’t reached.

You becoming blinded by anger, and selfishness.

Leaving the person who done you good feeling bad, unappreciated, and useless.

When someone stops doing something for you,

only then you’ll only realize and learn to appreciate what you no longer have.

“Appreciation can make a day, even change a life. Your willingness to put it into words is all that is necessary.” ~ Margaret Cousins

Appreciation

Regrets

We regret things we’ve done in the past.

Things we aren’t proud of doing,

or things we cannot undo.

These regret scars us for life

due to we can’t fix the past.

These mistakes in the past

haunts us and affects our future, and our life.

Always thinking about the regrets we have,

and thinking of how we could’ve made a difference.

We keep blaming ourselves,

and we tend not to forgive ourselves.

We spend our present thinking about regrets we have in the past.

Not knowing about what we could do to ourselves by forgiving ourselves.

Not bothering to think about how we could be happy, instead of feeling guilt.

Hoping we could fix the regrets in life,

instead of a better tomorrow.

“Never regret. If it’s good, it’s wonderful. If it’s bad, it’s experience.” ~ Victoria Holt

Mistakes

Rarely done or not,

People seems to focus on mistakes.

The tiniest ones are held against you eternally.

Apologies are said to be accepted,

But the action shown is unbelievable.

The kindness ones are to be pitied.

For the deed they do are just actions,

And the mistakes they do are seen as sins.

The fools are meant to be punished.

For the mistakes they do are just actions,

And the deed they do are seen as power.

Oh what world do we live in?

If no one can define the true meaning of mistakes.

“Everyone makes mistakes in life, but that doesn’t mean they have to pay for them the rest of their life. Sometimes GOOD people make BAD choices. It doesn’t mean they’re bad… It means they’re HUMANS!” ~ Unknown

Missing

Being away from someone

we love is like a big puzzle

in our heart that is missing.

Trying to complete it with

attention from someone,

is a way to fool ourselves,

The part of us wanting

to forget the sadness,

while the other part

is waiting for that someone to come back.

Wishing to hug them,

but trying to deny the truth.

Knowing you’ll be back here,

but expecting the worst.

So I’ll wait for now,

till the missing days are over.

“Missing someone is your heart’s way of telling you that you love them.” ~ Unknown